This question, ‘Why do men cheat?’ has been puzzling many women for a long time, decades, and even centuries. Sometimes, a man may seem to have everything he wants, a great partner or spouse, yet he is caught pants down with someone else.
When a man is caught cheating, he usually needs to face the consequences like divorce, loss of family, social standing, or sometimes a job, yet men still cheat. Why? Below are general factors that can drive a man into cheating, not minding the fact that he may lose a lot from the act.
Why Do Men Cheat – 13 Reasons Why Men Cheat
1. Lack of maturity
This is one factor that answers the question, ‘Why Do Men Cheat?’
And interestingly, maturity has nothing to do with age. Many people assume that the older they are, the more mature they should be.
However, it is not valid in most cases. If a man has not gained enough experience in a committed relationship and his life, he won’t understand the reason why and the importance of being faithful.
For mature men, they know and accept temptations outside of their relationships or marriages. But they know what is more precious to them, and they will kill off any sexual urge that comes with being with another person.
If a man is immature, he may not understand that he has to pay for the consequences that cheating causes.
To him, monogamy is one jacket that can be worn when in front of your partner but tossed off when you see a ‘hottie’ close by.
2. Recurring problems
It is another reason behind the question, ‘Why Do Men Cheat?’. He may be one that is involved in addiction like drugs or alcohol that cloud his mind when thoughts about sex come into play.
He may also have a sexual addiction problem, which means that he has no control over his sexual behavior and fantasies, no matter how they affect him.
3. Wrong beliefs about cheating in a relationship
Did you know that not every man has the same idea about cheating in relationships?
Some men don’t even think it’s wrong to cheat. And they believed that as long as they are not get caught, then it’s not considered cheating. And when they get caught, they always have ways to get another chance.
Men who have those wrong beliefs about cheating will set them a stage for potential cheating. And this is one of the critical reasons why men cheat.
Therefore, it’s crucial to find out your man’s beliefs about cheating before going to a fully committed relationship.
4. When a man is insecure
It’s common to see men cheating who are insecure. Especially those who feel that they are too young or too old, not as wealthy as they would like to be, or not good looking enough; or smart enough.
So, to prove that they are the men in control of things, they are jumping from one person to the other without even minding if their partners would get hurt.
It’s funny that a large number of those men cheating claim that it’s because of a mid-life crisis.
They are eagerly seeking validation and have their egos massaged. And they feel good if they can bed with more women than their folks, and brag about it.
To them, they cheat because they need to validate their empty hearts. If they do not cheat, they have no self-worth, or desire for themselves.
5. The urge to end a relationship version 1
Some men go ahead to cheat when they are tired of their relationships.
Instead of them to muster up the courage and tell their partners that they want to end the relationships, they cheat.
They let their partners find out and do the dirty job that they didn’t dare to do. It’s that simple to many of them.
6. The urge to end a relationship version 2
Like above, some men may want to end their relationships, but they don’t want to do it right now. As they don’t have the next relationships that he can jump into immediately.
That’s why they go out there and start new relationships, while they are still parading themselves as a great lover in the previous one.
7. Don’t have good male friends
When a man undervalues the need to have other men as friends, a type of rock, it may affect him in his relationship.
These male friends are supposed to be there to meet part of his emotional and social needs.
When he doesn’t have these friends, he is left to rely on his partner. He may feel lonely in a relationship if his partner couldn’t give him enough attention.
If his partner is unable to meet up to his needs, he may have his eyes wandering elsewhere. Having male friends to talk to can go a long way to keep a man sane.
But, only the good male friends will do the good to your man, you know what I mean, right?
8. Confusing Limerence – the rush of a budding romance with love
Yes, this has made many relationships suffer because a man couldn’t tell both apart. When you are in a relationship with a person for the first time, you tend to lose steam.
Some men may go outside searching, and find Limerence, the new romance’s neurochemical rush, and have it confused with love.
They tend to forget that there are other, more in-depth types of connections in a long-term relationship that may never be seen in Limerence.
Limerence never lasts for long; it disappears with time.
9. Childhood Abuse
Some men cheat because they faced a type of childhood abuse. It could be emotional abuse, neglect, sexual abuse, physical abuse, and lots more.
The wounds that he got as a child prevent him from forming the necessary attachment in a relationship.
He is left with one intimacy issue or the other that prevents him from staying with one person. Sexual infidelity may be his way of coping.
Unless such people undergo therapy, monogamy is far from them.
This is a great reason that fuels the question, ‘Why Do Men Cheat?’ Most men cheat because they do not care how it impacts his partner or those around him.
The only thing he is bothered about is himself. He wouldn’t mind telling lies upon lies, and keeping great secrets, without stopping for a second to think about his partner. Look out for the five signs he will cheat again here.
The truth may be that he never thought monogamy was a thing that should ever be practiced. Instead of sacrificing to be monogamous, he mocks the tenets, and beds as many people as he can.
11. He Is Unique
Some men live in a world where rules do not apply to them. That’s why this is the reason why they cheat.
Those around them can decide to obey the monogamy code, but definitely NOT him. And they believe that cheating is a reward meant for only them.
12. Not being disciplined
Some men cheat because they are undisciplined. He may not have thought of cheating or set out to deceive, but once a chance comes his way, he quickly loses his discipline and gets involved.
Without stopping to think of how infidelity can affect him, he goes ahead to do it. When he gets the impulse, all that matters to him is to satisfy himself.
Some men are lack of responsibility. They don’t know how to be responsible for their partner, even in committed relationships.
They can’t think from their partners’ point of view and take responsibility for their actions.
By now, we hope you could get a better idea about the question “Why do men cheat?”. It’s challenging to pinpoint the exact reasons why men cheat; however, they are always reasons behind the act.
If you ever find your partner cheating on you, it’s better to understand the reasons why. There are things you both can do to fix the relationship and be happy again.
However, they are things you can’t fix; then, you should end the relationship and move on.
It doesn’t mean he cheated before would cheat again, but it is your choice if you want to give him a second chance.
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Kay is in her 50′s, is divorced with grown sons, and has been back in the dating game for 5 years. She’s met a surprising assortment of men from online dating sites, many of whom were very nice but just not right for her. Some remain friends. She now refuses to meet anyone at Starbucks